The cafeteria is being remodeled at the Bangkok Orphanage. The kids are gathered in the courtyard, where we just serenaded them with song and play. One member of our group, Jana Stanfield, can sing and the rest of us are simply stumbling choral backup dancers. Next, lunch is brought to the children in baskets and trays. We help in passing out food.

Our hosts invite us to enter the place where the children are cared for who are unable to walk and, in many cases, to even sit up. We remove our shoes as we enter, as the children are lying on mats and having lunch. The floor is their kitchen table. Let that sink in for a moment. The floor is their kitchen table. My spirit is thinking, I have so much and yet can feel so lacking. I am humbled.

What happened next, I did not expect, was not ready for, nor may never ever see again. Children with the most severe handicaps and limited capabilities, spoons in hand… feeding each other. They are unable to feed themselves, so they feed each other. With the little they have, they feed each other.

Charity, care, or compassion? Possibly it’s to simply meet the basic need of eating the only way possible. To forget themselves and to focus on another, they feed each other. The hunger is quenched and the human spirit is touched in the deepest of ways.
Take a look this short video and notice the smiles and ask yourself, “How may I feed another today? Where may I bring a little joy, hope, or show concern? Could it be that in doing so, my soul may the one that is actually fed?” In the background, Jana’s song takes on new meaning, “I want to be your friend, a little bit more…”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73KoDK-Bfqs

Visiting an orphanage takes you to places you don’t expect. It’s not the orphanage, the kids, the conditions, and the needs. It’s the places in your heart that become opened and exposed. First to yourself, and then, if you let it, to your companions. As you meet the eyes of a child, a connection is made. The only language the heart can truly hear is love. When in a foreign land, it may be the only way you can communicate.

Today we visited two orphanages in Bangkok, Thailand. The first was for kids with disabilities. We come as six friends and colleagues to see how we may bring some joy, if even for a moment to a child. Scott has toys, stickers and magic tricks. Jana brings her guitar and gift of song. Laurie is ready to lead the Hokey Pokey. Shari will demonstrate the three kinds of laughter. Mark will film and capture some magical moments and me… well I get to share a word or two though the translator and then loose myself in holding children who reach out for hugs or to be picked up.

We are careful ask how we may interact and the do’s and don’ts and protocols. It is our desire to strive to bring dignity to each moment. Yet, once within the orphanage with our gracious hosts from Hope Worldwide… Well it’s six friends and a group of kids.

So in we go for our first visit and within moments it seems that all is forgotten and children begin to coax us out of ourselves with their smiles and hugs. As the barriers of communication begin to quickly drop, so do the walls around each of our hearts. It’s our gentle prodding of our play coupled with their joy that meets across the atrium and within moments kids are reaching out for hugs and to be lifted from the concrete, into your caring embrace. Try to set a child down and they lift their feet as to say, “I can’t touch the ground, so not yet. Please, not yet. Just play with me in such a way that I get to be hugged.”

So this morning we both give and receive hugs for hello. The trinkets we leave behind are memories of the play and touch, the smiles and song, the laughter and the grace of connecting hearts… even if for just a moment.

It’s interesting that as we come to reach out, hoping to make even a small difference, they in turn give us a gift of opening our hearts. Often the waves of tears we experience are not about the conditions of the orphanage; it’s the condition of our own hearts being revealed. So you meet and know each other a bit… and yourself even more. Hugs for hello…

This morning I slid into the pew at church next to an elderly couple. The gentleman looked up at me as I sat down, I smiled and said, “Do you want to snuggle?” He grinned and said “No.” He slid over to give me some room as he whispered, “No, I’ll snuggle with her.” I found it so charming as he slid up next to his wife of many years.

“What are your names?” I asked.

“George and Marcile,” he whispered.  “We’ve been married 59 years.”

Well, throughout the service I broke from my manners and we kidded back and forth at different times.  At one point I managed to drop the kneeler on his foot, which lead to a light rabbit punch on my arm.

At the end of the service during the announcements, our pastor announced the milestone of a couple that had been married for 50 years.  During the applause I leaned over and whispered, “amateurs.”

George grinned back and so I went onto say, “They’re just kids.”

At that point George, looked at me and in a matter of fact voice stated, “It’s all in your perspective.”

It does seem that most of life is that way.  Our perspective shapes our life. Thoughts are the foundation of beliefs, attitudes and feelings. All actions flow from them.

As the service ended and we were walking out, I helped George with his cane and asked, “So how did you two meet?”

“Well,” he said. “It was at a mixer in college. I liked her but she didn’t like me at first.”

“Really… why was that?”  I said.

“Well, she didn’t like my name, so it took her a while to warm up to me.”  George shared, as he smiled and threw a glance Marcile’s way.

“Okay Marcile,” I exclaimed. “What was up with his name?”

Marcile started in, “Well, George was a name from John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men and there was a cartoon on TV that made George out to be not so favorable. They’d say, ‘Which way did he go, George?’ and that bothered me for a while.”

Now I am thinking, what’s a while?  So I ask, “Uh, Marcile, how long was a while?”

George answered this one himself.  “We met in February, I proposed in June and we got married in September.”

“So, let me get this straight here. With all the time it took for her to warm up, it took you all the way to June to propose? That’s four whole months!”

He grinned and said, “John, it’s all in your perspective.”

What’s your perspective on the happenings of your work and life?  What are the realities that you truly cannot change? Consider, with what perspective, lens, history and context do you come to these situations? What would change, if you shifted your perspective? Just a thought… but then, everything begins with one.